IS BETTER THAN 

Why does Squaw Valley think they’re top dog in the pack of ski resorts?

How come everyone I know from Squaw Valley thinks they are so much better than me. Maybe it falls into the pompous California cool attitude? Or maybe they need to make up for something, if you know what I’m saying. Whatever the reason, I’m sick of it… I mean every third post on Unofficial Networks is talking about how cool Squaw Valley is, or commenting on how awesome KT-22 is. Well, in this post I am going to throw a stick in the spokes of the egos held by Squaw Valley locals and those who rep this Squaw illusion. Simply put, Whistler is a better place to ski than Squaw. California has a reputation to uphold, a hang-it-out-there “I’m better than you are” attitude. It’s no surprise to me that Squaw-ites feel obligated to let the world know that their ski area is the tits, and nipples. This becomes contagious and then slowly Squaw Valley news is the only ski news that you hear about, and one can see the downward spiral that ensues, it’s unhealthy.

I’m here to set the record straight and let the world know that Squaw Valley, California is actually not that rad.

Well the Squaw stronghold on ski badass’ery may be somewhat attributed to the reputation that Canadians must also uphold. Up here in OH Canada we’re the redheaded stepchild whose opinions aren’t taken seriously. Or maybe we’ve got  the “we know our terrain is sick but don’t really care if anyone else knows this as well, because of our non-confrontational” attitude (“non-confrontational” possibly thrown out the window after the riots). Either way, I’m a fake half-breed Canadian so I have no qualms about coming right out and saying that Whistler is way better than Squaw Valley, and I encourage all Whistler-folk to do the same. In this article I will discuss mountain stats and the surrounding Backcountry. Also, night life (or lack of in Squaw’s case), summer, winter and everything in between, plus the population of professional skiers. So, to you California girls, and guys, here’s why you’re not actually that bad ass.

Lets begin with Mountain Statistics

Whistler Blackcomb: (from Whistlerblackcomb.com)

 

Average Snowfall -410 inches per year

Total Terrain -8,171 acres/3,307hectares

Trails -200+

Top elevation -2,284 meters/ 7,494ft

Village elevation -675 meters/2,214ft

Vertical: Whistler 1530 meters / 5020ft, Blackcomb 1609 meters / 5135ft

Number of lifts -37

Squaw Valley: (from Ski Report because Squaw Valley’s website sucks balls)

 

Average snowfall -400 inches

Total terrain -4000 acres (6000+ with new inclusion of Alpine)

Trails -170

Top elevation -9,050ft

Village elevation -6,200ft

Vertical  -2,850ft

Number of lifts -33

Backcountry and sled access

Whistler and the surrounding backcountry can be summed up with two words, endless possibilities.  From the resort there are backcountry gates on both mountains, Whistler & Blackcomb (that provide access to the spearhead and beyond). The backcountry that you can access via snowmobile unreal, it’s the best sled access terrain in the world.

Squaw Valley –At Squaw Valley it’s illegal to go out of bounds from the resort and there’s not much sled access terrain around Tahoe.

Location:

Whistler = 2 hours from Vancouver, (the coolest city on earth)

Squaw Valley = 3.5 hours from San Francisco (also very cool) but I-80 traffic is very slow. Plus Squaw is one hour from Reno (the worst city in the USA)

Night life

Whistler =Drinking age, 19

In British Columbia the drinking age is 19. This not only means there will be more people in the bars/clubs of Whistler (in contrast to the typicsl ski-town sausage fest), but there will be younger girls who get drunk easier and make (what they would call) bad decisions.

Squaw Valley =Drinking age, 21

“The night life in Squaw Valley is dead, useless, non existent, and dangerous….unless you like men” 

– Miles Clark, Squaw Valley Local and manager of Unofficial Squaw

To Squaw fans: Shave your beard and stop pretending that the bar is for sophisticated man-type people with facial hair only, who drink for the sake of drinking and brag about their lines that day. You all want fresh young beardless girls to join you in these drinking establishments.

Summer Activities

Squaw Valley – Californian in the summer, sounds good right? Local skier miles clark says,

“I never go to Squaw Valley in the summer, there’s not much going on”.

The California coast is what you’ve all heard and dreamt about. NOT the skeleton of a ski town 200 miles inland. Lake Tahoe is nearby (not immediately adjacent).

Whistler

Opposite from the lack of happenings in Squaw, Whistler is filled with events, tourists and hot Canadian girls. The summer kicks off with the World Ski and Snowboard Festival, and concludes with Crankworx, the biggest bike festival in the world. If that’s not enough Whistler has one of, if not, the best Mtn. bike parks on earth. The village in Whistler is always packed and to make it even better you can go skiing. YEP, in Whistler you can ski all summer on the glacier. No comparison to Squaw.

Pro Skiers:

Whistler –Dana Flahr, James Heim, Ian McIntosh, Mike Douglas, Rory Bushfield, Sarah Burke, Mark Abma, Josh Bibby, Mike Henitiuk, The Treadway brothers, Shaun Pettit, Callum Pettit, Kye Peterson, Eric Hjorleifson, Mike Riddle ,Cory Vanular, Justin Dory, Chris Turpin, PY Leblanc, Charlie Ager, Leigh Powis, Josh Stack

Squaw Valley –JT Holmes, Mike Wilson, Timmy Dutton, Cody Townsend, The Gaffney’s, Ingrid Backstrom (I’ll give you Ingrid but she just moved to Whistler, suckers)

 

Claim to fame

Whistler:

-# 1 ski resort in North America since 1998  (ski/skiing/freeskier/transworld…the ratings go back to 1998)

-2010 Olympic Winter games

Squaw Valley:

–Hot dog the movie (come on guys, really… Harkin Banks is a tool, but on second thought the movie is soft core porn)

-1960 Olympic Winter Games (it’s like your high school quarter back still wearing his letter jacket 40 years later. GET OVER IT)

 

I don’t need to rub it in anymore, it’s obvious that Whistler is clearly better in every category. Sure Whistler’s in Canada and yes Canada is filled with Canadians who have beady eyes and flappy heads, but thats neither here nor there. The purpose of this rant was to dum-down the ego’s of the bro-bra-better than you- skiers at Squaw Valley. Don’t get down on yourself Squaw locals or take this as a malicious attack on your beliefs (cough ughh… RECCO).  I’m sure Squaw Valley is a really fun resort (to visit) and I truly thank Squaw for taking a percentage of the worlds ski gapers, who, if Squaw Valley didn’t exist would be clogging the lift lines at Whistler Blackcomb.

Do yourself a favor Squaw Valley locals and make a trip to Canada this winter