Image from julbo-eyewear
When you move to a ski town, your hairstyle doesn’t always follow. Sometimes it takes on a life of its own, growing horizontally or in Glen Plake’s case vertically. Yet, everyone has their own style.
Here are the 8 different styling’s you are bound to find in a ski town.
The Rags: Anyone who has ever lived in a ski town knows a guy sporting rags on top of their noggin. The rags flowing off their dome don’t come in any particular logic; actually they defy logic in a counter-culture kind of way. They flow whichever way they grow and are not susceptible to combs or shampoo. However, after a day of skiing, the proprietor of this hairstyle can let his follicles go wherever they damn well please, creating some awesome helmet hair in the process.
The Riches: Also known as “the swoop,” those trying to stay true to their suburban roots espouse this hairstyle. The Riches hairstyle is one for the ages and is also applicable to guys who’ve stuck it out and started their own business in a ski town. Basically, it allows their six figure clients to relate to them. All the while, The Riches retain the casual do, without product in the hair.
The Gandalf: Possibly the best of all ski town haircuts, the Gandalf has become a favorite of both young and old. Although the older ski bums wear it best, up and comers are beginning to rock the overgrown goatee with flowing hair. The result is a sign of wisdom and trustworthiness. Never met a Gandalf I didn’t like.
The Macklemore: It found its way to ski towns? Really? Shit. This hipster hairstyle arrived this past winter a year late and it looks to be sticking around. Those endorsing the Macklemore hairstyle are typically hipsters, who own art-galleries and hail from the West Coast or they’re just Roger Klotz from Nickelodeon’s hit series Doug. However those counter-conformist aficionados don’t realize their hair looks pretty Nazi, which is pretty conformist… man.
The Man-bun: Those wearing the man-bun are typically kayaking and climbing brohemoths. Their hair usually compliments their heady Prana SSBD (Short-Sleeve Button Down). Bottom-line, they’re pretty Zen right now. Chances are, all of our ladies are secretly hooking up with the man bun on the side.
The Wook: It’s hard to tell where the Wook’s face begins and hair ends. They seem to run into each other in a Chewbacca sort of way. However, the Wook is a dedicated ski bum and his lack of attention to grooming is in direct correlation to his dedication to skiing and bluegrass jams. More time skiing/playing the stand-up bass > getting haircuts and shaving.
The Baldy: Known for crushing triathlons and ultra-marathons, the Baldy is known for his lack of hairstyle. That lack of hair allows this hardcore late 30’s guy to crush you physically. It comes as no surprise, that The Baldy get’s in more laps then you on your favorite chair, climbs harder than you in the summer, and actually achieves lofty objectives that most ski bums only dream of. In the words of Larry David, “Have a conversation with a bald man sometime. Go ahead. Do yourself a favor. Tell me you don’t walk away impressed. That your day was not made a little richer by virtue of the fact that you were in Bald[y]’s presence.”
Beard Only: A variation of the Baldy, the beard only look is kind of scary, especially for the ladies. It says, I can’t grow hair on top of my head… so I’ll grow a ton of hair on my chin instead. These guys usually work in bike shops as mechanics. Also, see Scott Ian of Anthrax.