Extreme Skiing Legend
My childhood hero, Mr. Schmidt. Photo: The North Face

How many times have you seen some dude skiing around and your buddy points and says, “that guy’s sponsored, can you believe it? He skis like a chump.” I’m sure you can relate. It’s also the case that quite often we can ski circles around them. So why aren’t we sponsored? What does it take to be a salaried pro skier? Do you fit the bill?

Alaska skiing
Can you look this good? Photo: ESPN

 

Well I think I do, so here are my Top Ten Reasons Why I Should Be a Sponsored Skier:

10.      I don’t think I’m a good skier…I know…

9.         I am the only person in the world who still wears a Nat Lacen jacket

8.         I can send Air Jordan on 224 Downhill Skis

7.         Chuck Norris is afraid to ski with me

6.         If you give me free shit and a salary, I will actually make you money

5.         Part of the MENSA International Ski Genius Freeride Team 

4.         I have a talent for bullshitting about gear and really like to hear myself speak

3.         I’m really good looking AND a Canadian

2.         I have a tattoo of Scot Schmidt on my back

1.         My last name is ‘Skier’

 

I’m thinking this will get me a full ride with Kastle or Volkl and a full clothing sponsorship with Arcteryx. Maybe Audi could give me an RS6 to cruise around in too. Although a WRX could work just as well. I’m not picky. Then I could travel around, ski all over the world and sell really cool stuff. Maybe I could even get a date with Lindsey Vonn.

Ninja Skier Lindsey Vonn
So hot...If I was sponsored, I could ask her on a date. Photo: ESPN

But let’s hear from you guys.

What are your Top Ten Reasons? Why should you be a pro skier?

Maybe we can all get on the bandwagon and drive to work in sweet rides and get travel budgets for Heli time.

Be safe, sell lots and ski hard

Joe Skier

 

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6 replies on “Top Ten Reasons Why I Should be Sponsored – What are Yours?”