Photo’s by Ryan Salm
Skier & Words by Rusty Reams
Location – Pony Express, The Palisades, Squaw Valley USA

There is currently an epidemic of a contagious disease in Olympic Valley.  FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out), is a highly communicable disease that is found in alpine environments with extremely high snow fall. Once it strikes, it can affect the entire body, and has been known to spread to friends, groups, and entire lift lines.

On Sunday afternoon I could feel a case of FOMO developing in my stomach and worsening each hour the upper mountain remained closed.  By the time I got to my last KT lap, my outbreak was full on.  I was paralyzed; I couldn’t drive anywhere.  The only relief for my rapidly deteriorating condition was located on the upper mountain.  So I emailed work and let them know that I had contracted a full blown case of FOMO and I would be “sick” on Monday.

The next day, my condition was rabid.  I was FOMOing at the mouth.  I couldn’t get to the mountain fast enough.  When I got in the line at KT, I found the condition was widespread.  Everyone in the lift line had contracted it. It was as if we were all in the waiting room to go see a doctor to treat our condition.  At 9 am the KT vaccine was distributed and everyone found a bit of relief as they loaded the chair.

Each lap that morning skied like a race for the cure.  Hot and fast. Nose to Fingers laps helped put me at ease, but when I heard that patrol was going to open the Palisades at noon, my condition relapsed.

As patrol flipped the blue sign and we started making our pilgimage to the Chimney, I looked at the other FOMO striken faces.  It was like a plague. Everyone was going up there looking for their remedy. I started scoping the lines over to the right, but I wasn’t finding the cure.  Then when I got over to Schmidiots, I looked up and saw this hanging straightline from across the way. It looked rowdy, but then again so was my condition.

As I looked down the in run, I saw that this was an extremely high and potentially lethal dosage of the only available medication. The only way to take it was to mainline it. By wacking the cornice I had broken through the child safety lock and saw the cure for my condition. I laid my skis up over the edge, stabbed straight in, pressed the plunger, and felt the insatiable release.

For more images from last week’s “Palisade Session” check out:

The Line of the Week will be a weekly photo piece by Ryan Salm featuring some of Tahoe’s finest athletes doing whatever we deem rad. We will be using the term “Line” loosely to describe anything resembling chutes, big airs, pointers or any general madness. All images are the property and copyright of Ryan Salm Photography.

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