Unofficial Managing Editor, Barclay Idsal does his best ‘Ski Boot Danceaholic’ at Hennu Stall in Zermatt | Photo: Katie Sherwood | Cover: Retro Ski Shop

The ski day ends as you ride a post-ski buzz as far as possible without hitting concrete. Upon stashing your planks, the crew makes its way to the local watering hole to enjoy a post-ski libation.

Related: What Your Ski Boots Say About You As A Person | Ski Stereotypes [Part 5]

For skiers and riders, the ritual of ‘après-ski’ is serious business. Après serves as a punctuation mark and just like our sentences, we like our ski days to end with BANG! So with that in mind we’re shouting out our favorite aprés animal’s and their go-to outfits. Here we go…

Funny Onesie Guy Or Gal

Onesie game on point | Photo: Retro Ski Shop

This guy/gal is easily identifiable by their do-it-all onesie that’s over two decades old. Maybe it’s made by Descente, maybe Bogner but does it matter? Of course it does. This person likely skis badly, parties well, and holds fashion in high regard. For this guy or gal, Aprés is usually the main event. Regardless, it’s a safe assumption that this individual will ask you if you want to take a Jaeger shot with them multiple times throughout the course of the afternoon/evening.

Dude Wearing Crocs?

This person doesn’t give a shit what you think about their footwear. These skiers stuffed their feet into 130 flex, hard-plastic ski boots all day and come 4:00 PM– comfort is the top priority for these 30-something’s who are starting to feel their age. While the Crocs person may not be out to impress anyone, their desire for utmost comfort following a day of hard charging deserves respect.

Ski Boot Dance-aholic

If you’re going to dance in ski boots– accept no substitute. | Photo: Rudy Herman

This person creates more questions than anyone else. The main question being– why? Usually the answer to that question is sitting at the mid-mountain bar before making a precarious descent towards aprés. Once there, they celebrate their survival by swilling PBR’s until they’re on the dance-floor, sweating bullets. There’s also a good chance this person wakes up the next day in their ski boots still on.

Turtleneck Wearing, Sweat Soaked Dad

This upper class dad from Boston is on ski vacation and his wife is taking care of the kids for the afternoon. You know what that means– Aprés for the boys! That’s bad news for the rest of the bar as Mr. Beasly’s 100% cotton, sweat soaked turtleneck stinks worse than the cloud of fart already occupying the bar.

Extreme Aprés

Apres can be dangerous business, be prepared! | Photo: Extreme Apres

There’s nothing more hardo than wearing your beacon to the bar after a day of shredding GNAR. These folks want everyone to know they got out there, skied the untracked, and are prepared to be rescued from beneath an avalanche of Rainier tallboys and Jamo shots if things get hairy.

The Flannel & Carhartt Local

This person armed with the utilitarian flannel & Carhartt combo just got off work and since they have a Ski Locker, a fresh pair of threads await post-ski. They know full-well that drinks are mandatory after skiing/work and this person strikes a comfortable balance between fashion and comfort. While they aren’t wearing ski gear, it’s obvious they ski more than anyone else at the bar as evidenced by their disheveled hair and google tan.

*These are just a few of the most common characters in the ever-important après ski scene. Feel free to share any other common characters that can be found at any ski bar.