Keri Russell as Sari in Cocaine Bear, directed by Elizabeth Banks.

In September 1985, Andrew Thornton, who was a drug smuggler, accidentally unloaded a duffel bag of cocaine above Georgia. A one-hundred seventy-five bear ingested some of that cocaine and promptly died shortly afterward. Hollywood, which is a little devoid of ideas at the moment, created a movie based on this concept.

On February 24th, 2023, Universal Pictures is releasing Cocaine Bear, which is loosely (emphasis on loosely) based on the 1985 events. He was found three months later next to forty opened plastic containers of cocaine. The main difference is instead of going out quickly, this bear goes on a killing rampage. The trailer for the 2024 Academy Award Winner for Best Picture is below.

This movie looks absolutely absurd. It looks a bit like a comedy and a horror film, and it may somehow be the dumbest thing I’ve seen on the internet this year. Yet somehow, I need to see this in theaters.

I regard The Room as one of my favorite movies, in spite of it being widely panned as one of the worst movies ever made. There are genuinely movies that are so bad that they’re good, and this looks like it will fit that box. This will likely be a box office smash, and the memeability makes it a must-watch in the theater.

Image/Video Credits: Universal Pictures

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