With Gore-tex jackets, Kevlar boots, and lifetime guarantee ski socks, gear has never been better. Wait a second is that true? How do we measure gear’s worth?
Functionality and fashion would be what any ski wear designer would say but is that the true measure of any item’s worth. What about style, comfort, and most importantly sex appeal?
During the 80’s these factors reigned supreme and what is often referred to as the golden age of skiing was also the golden age of ski gear. Why?
Here Are 5 Reasons Why 80’s Ski Gear Is Better Than Gear Today
5) Tight Pants
Sure, yoga pants (like Tinder) have left nothing up to the imagination. But during ski season yoga pants are hidden underneath sick Gore-tex shell pants and behold, asses disappear. In the 80’s on the other hand, ski pants were the equivalent of yoga pants and ladies (and guys) let their asses hang. Big time. Whether it was the cocaine diets or the Lycra, the asses were on point and the pants matched the asses. Also, those pants provided exceptional support for your junk.
The only downside, fierce moose-knuckles and vicious camel toes…
4) Bright Colors
And I’m not talking about these clean blues, greens, and reds you see from Patagonia but ridiculous purples, pinks, and turquoise mixtures that by aesthetic virtue are in complete conflict. However, there’s a certain beauty in the chaos of 80’s colors and instead of having a difference between gapers and locals, everyone looked the same back in the day. Bottomline, we’re all gapers to some degree and 80’s style confirmed that view-point.
Find More Retro Ski Gear Here: Need A Onesie? Find All That And More @RetroSkiShop
3) Goggles and Sunglasses
Sure goggles were foggy as shit and the lenses were coated with some horrible substance that smudged if the wind blew from the wrong direction but has google style improved since Harkin Bank’s sick Smith’s? Simple answer, no. Also, reflecting lens goggles and sunglasses were all the rage and everyone looked like Iceman from Top Gun. Bottomline, eyewear was both sexy and stylish and horribly dysfunctional. However, you didn’t need to constantly change lenses because you didn’t know any better. The 80’s were just a simpler time for eyewear period.
2) Base Layers Were Cheap AF
Back in the day, they were called “long johns” not base-layers and they were unbelievably cheap. Growing up in New York, a pair of itchy, wool “long johns” were never over $10 bucks and although they were itchy, they smelled much better than the synthetic tight base layers made today.
This is bar none the reason why 80’s ski gear is better than gear today. Onesies were the staple of the 80’s and cold ass cracks were non-existent, snow stayed in your face and mustache only, not to mention outdoor aprés was much warmer than it is today.
Worried about that Onesie not being Gore-Tex? Here’s How To Make Your Jacket Waterproof Again…